...о работе...

My first job was working in an orange juice factory,
but I got canned...
couldn't concentrate.

Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack,
but I just couldn't hack it,
so they gave me the ax.

After that I tried to be a tailor,
but I just wasn't suited for it,
mainly because it was a sew-sew job.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory,
but that was too exhausting.

Then I tried to be a chef,
I figured it would add a little spice to my life,
but I just didn't have the thyme.

I attempted to be a deli worker,
but any way I sliced it,
I couldn't cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician,
but eventually
I found I wasn't noteworthy.

I studied a long time to become a doctor,
but I didn't have any patience.

Next was a job in a shoe factory I tried,
but I just didn't fit in.

I became a professional fisherman,
but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company,
but the work was just too draining.

So then I got a job in a workout center,
but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

After many years of trying to find steady work
I finally got a job as a historian,
but there was no future in it.

My last job was working at Starbucks,
but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind.

SO I RETIRED AND FOUND THAT I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!

про самолетов и пилотов

Just in case you need a laugh:

Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one.
Reassurance for those of us who fly routinely in our jobs.

After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked
with an S) by maintenance engineers.

By the way, Qantas is the only major airline thathas never, ever, had an accident.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to: straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And the best one for last....

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

...слабость и сильность...

…как написано: нет праведного ни одного; нет разумевающего; никто не ищет Бога; все совратились с пути, до одного негодны; нет делающего добро, нет ни одного. Гортань их - открытый гроб; языком своим обманывают; яд аспидов на губах их. Уста их полны злословия и горечи. Ноги их быстры на пролитие крови; разрушение и пагуба на путях их; они не знают пути мира. Нет страха Божия перед глазами их…

Читала сегодня и думала о тех неверующих, которых я знаю и которых не люблю. Типа, это они такие... Плохие они. А потом подумала, дорогая, это же к тебе тоже относится самым наипрямейшим образом. Только благодаря Христу у тебя есть надежда на изменения, и ты уже не под законом греха. Но твое сердце без Христа точно такое же, твоя «черная собака» все еще живая и дает о себе знать, когда ты ее подкармливаешь и даешь силы себя проявить...

Нет твоей заслуги в этом. НЕТ!

Как мне не хочется верить в это! Как хочется думать, что я сама! Своими силами...

Смешно.

Глупо.

Страшно.

Первый пост в новом году.

Зима.

Мыши прилетели.

Счастье.